


Cemetery Weather

by pisceanGeneticist



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Sadstuck, if you're not crying at the end of this fic then I'm not doing my job, original chacters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-04-02
Updated: 2012-05-03
Packaged: 2017-11-02 21:55:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/373753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pisceanGeneticist/pseuds/pisceanGeneticist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Told in the point of view of Dave and Jade's daughter, Leena.</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Told in the point of view of Dave and Jade's daughter, Leena.

Dave Strider was only 19 when he found out the love of his life was pregnant. At first, he was shocked. He told me it was as if his life was over and just beginning at the same time. He nearly passed out; face pale, eyes wide, speechless.

 

===> [Flashback] Dave: Hear the news.

 

_“Dave? Dave? Oh god Dave please tell me you’re there. I can’t do this alone…. Dave I’m so scared.” The voice on the phone was shaken, tears obvious, she was so terrified._

_“Yeah… I’m here. What do you mean do this alone? You won’t, I’m here I’ll always be here. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I love you,” he spoke confidently into his cellphone. He was scared out of his fucking mind, he was only 19 how can he manage a kid? He wasn’t sure, but he’d figure it out. He loved this girl, and he wasn’t going to let go of her, or the baby._

_  
_

**__\- - - -**

 

A few days later he called his two best friends to talk about the issue. Karkat Vantas and John Egbert. John was confused but excited, but Karkat had a few heated words on the matter (As always). Dave always smiled fondly when talking about Karkat’s rants, and I could see why. They were always amusing, never to be taken to heart.

 

===> [F] Dave: Tell your best friends the news.

 

_“WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK STRIDER? YOU’RE ONLY 8 SWEEPS FUCKING OLD. WHAT THE FUCK. DO YOU HONESTLY THINK YOU CAN HANDLE A FUCKING WRIGGLER? YOU CAN BARELY FUCKING HANDLE YOURSELF AND THE GIRL LET ALONE AN ENTIRE NEW FUCKING ASSHOLE.” Karkat almost flipped the table in his rage._

_“Hey don’t you think it’s a little early to be calling the baby an asshole? I mean, it’s only like a month old,” Egbert quipped._

_“SHUT YOUR PROTIEN CHUTE EGBERT. EVERYTHING IS AN ASSHOLE.”_

_“Funny way of seeing things,” Dave snarked. It only seemed to irritate the troll more, so he continued talking before he had a chance of an even more heated rebuttal. “Listen Karkat, I know it’s pretty fucking crazy. Me, having a kid, and with her of all people. I know chance of survival for this kid is pretty slim, and it’s gonna be fucked up in the head when it gets older, but nothing is changing the fact that it’s already here. Or on its way, whatever.”_

_“Cant fucking turn back time on this one Strider,” Karkat grumbled, having settled down._

_“Yeah I know… But at least I have you guys to help me.”_

_“Sorry, but was that fucking plural? No. I’m not dealing with MORE fucking wrigglers, I’ve had enough with them already. You fucked up. You’re on your fucking own Strider,” Karkat hissed as he got up and left the table of the outside cafe they met up at._

_“Babies are so cute! I loved them when we made our paradox selves. I wonder how Karkat can hate them? Anyways, I’m so happy for you Dave!! I get to be uncle Ebgert right?” John chirped excitedly. He was always happy for every situation._

_“Yeah yeah of course. And Karkat gets to be Uncle KK,” Dave said just loud enough so Karkat could hear as he walked away._

_“Fuck you. I’m not going to be included in your family fuck up. And there is no way in hell I’m going to be called Uncle KK!”_

 

**\- - - -**

 

And he was right, he wasn’t called Uncle KK ever. He was called Kitty. “You can’t turn back time on this one Strider,” Dave repeated quietly to himself while reminiscing once, “You know, now that I think of it, I don’t think I would have, even if I could,” he had told me, smiling. His red eyes shone brightly as he lit up. “You were the best thing that had ever happened to me. Other then all the other things before you of course.” Dave was always one to joke, I had learned at a young age to not take his sarcasm seriously.

I felt warm tears flood down my cheeks. “Shit. Don’t fucking cry.” I thought to myself. But I couldn’t help it. I used my coat sleeve to wipe away the tears, trying to conceal them before someone else could see. It was so much easier to hide everything through these aviators. Maybe that’s why dad wore them.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alot of feels.

I shuffled my feet, it was the beginning of February but the snow didn’t seem like it was letting up one bit. I burrowed myself into my jacket until I was snug and warm again. The wind blew wisps of my sandy brown hair into my face and the cold nipped at my nose. I acted like it didn’t bug me, I stood there, motionless, staring at the blinding white snow. As far as anyone was concerned, nothing bugged me. I had no emotion to anything and I was completely fine with everything. Though inside, sitting right where no one could see it was me; having a breakdown, crying hysterically, throwing fits, breaking everything, and screaming until I turned purple. Right in everyone’s blind spot. So very alone.

 

===> [F] Karkat: Try not to fight with Terezi again.

 

_“You’re stupid! You’re so fucking stupid! How the fuck did I get stuck with a stupid fucking asshole of a matesprit like you?” Terezi shouted. She was furious at Karkat. She didn’t even know why this time, at this point, the fight had drug on so long she forgot why they were fighting._

_“I don’t fucking know. Maybe you shouldn’t have fucking picked me! You had choices, a lot of them. And you still fucking picked me. You knew I was an asshole off the bat! So don’t act so fucking surprised about this.” Karkat was hardly shouting, maybe raising his voice a little to emphasize his point, but not actually shouting like Terezi. He didn’t want to fight anymore. He was so tired… He just wanted to be happy with her again, like when they were kids. He turned to leave, he wasn’t going to stay here any longer. It wouldn’t do any good if he stayed._

_“Where the fuck do you think you’re going? Are-” Terezi’s question was cut off by a slam. Karkat was gone. The quiet overwhelmed her. She dropped to her knees and broke down crying._

_“I just want you to stop leaving….” she whispered in her broken voice. But she knew Karkat couldn’t hear her. He would probably be halfway to the bar, getting ready to drink and fight. As usual._

**\- - -**

I look around for a moment to observe the scene around me. My Uncle John stood next to Vriska, with the most sullen look on his face. He looked like he had everything he’d ever cared for thrown in front of him and burned alive. His eyes were so empty. And his smiles were never as whole.

Karkat had his place next Terezi and John. His face hard, no hint of emotion. Though I could see through it, he was just as torn up as John and everyone else. I looked among the rest of the faces, Tavros, Gamzee, Sollux, Aradia, Feferi, Eridan, Nepeta, Equius, and Kanaya standing with Rose. Rose was clutching Kanaya’s hand tightly, tears streaming down her face.

Almost everyone was crying, because this was it. This was real. There was no more having a back up dream self or turning back time and hopping into a kernel sprite. This wasn’t a game anymore. Dave was dead. And he wasn’t coming back.

More tears. I struggled to keep them in. I searched for more faces, I spotted Dirk with Ms.Lalonde. She was crying on his shoulder. The tears were beginning to become a threat to myself again so I looked away. The pastor continued to drone on and I zoned out.

 

===> [F] Karkat: Make up with Terezi.

 

_Karkat turns the car around, he wasn’t going to drink tonight. He needed to stop fucking running away to drown his problems. He walked back into the hive to find Terezi in tears. Her head in her hands. He walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her, comforting her._

_”Stop crying. You’re making me feel like shit.” he muttered_

_”G-good,” she stuttered, “You’re a fucking dick.”_

_”If you keep talking like that I won’t feel as bad.” Karkat hugged her into him close, and she sniffled. “Listen, you know I fucking love you. A lot. You mean the world to me, let’s just stop fighting?” He would beg her on his hands and knees if that’s what it took. He was flushed so bad for her, the fights were murder on him._

_“Whatever.”_

_“Not good enough asshole_

_“Fine, okay. I love you too. You and your candy red blood,” Terezi said smiling. Then she licked his cheek and started laughing. Karkat was grossed out. He would never get used to that._

**\- - -**

I shivered. The cold was seeping through my jacket. I just wanted to go home. But home wasn’t an option anymore. Home was mom and dad. Dad’s rap offs. And my mom’s shooting practice. Despite how scared they were, they did a good job raising me. Dave Strider and Jade Harley. Or Jade Strider I should say.

I tried to keep my mind off everything but that was near damn impossible with that thing just mocking me like that. And by thing I mean the casket. Dark red wood with engravings of gears and crows on it. Just how Dave Strider would have it. Inside the wood lay my Father’s motionless body. Pale, cold, dressed in a fancy tux. I had thrown a fit when I seen the tux they put his body in.

 

===> [F] Leena: Go fucking apeshit.

 

_“THATS NOT MY FUCKING DAD! THAT’S NOT HIM. IT’S NOT FUCKING HIM.” Leena screamed. She had just seen her dad at the morgue dressed in a fancy tux for his funeral._

_”Leena please-” John had started._

_”NO. DON’T FUCKING SAY SHIT EGBERT BECAUSE IT’S NOT MY DAD! It’s not him,” her voice had cracked, “It’s not him. He wouldn’t wear a tux like that, it looks uncomfortable,” tears we’re streaming now, “and he wears jeans. And sneakers, and his r-record shirts… That’s not my dad. Dad wouldn’t ever dress like that…” she was slumped on the ground shaking and crying._

_John rushed and held her, picking her up off the ground as she bawled into his shirt. “Uncle J-John,” she hiccuped, “That’s not Dave, that’s not my daddy. My d-dad is alive. M-my dad smiled. My dad promised he wasn’t gonna leave my like my mom did. He fucking promised. He did….”_

_John was crying now too. Holding his best friends daughter tightly. He was afraid to let her go. It was all he had of Dave now. He hugged the little girl as she continued to sob into his shirt._

_”You’re right Leena, it’s not him. I remember him promising you that, so it couldn’t possibly be him,” Johns words kept getting caught in his throat. Dave strider was his best friend. Always had been, always will be. He didn’t know how sick he’d gotten. He had spoken to Dave a few days ago and he was fine. They were going to go see the new Nic Cage movie together. Leena would come along too of course. Then before he knew it, he was here at the morgue clutching a sobbing Leena while crying his own eyes out._

_“Uncle John…. I miss him,” Leena whispered._

_”Yeah.. I miss him too…” John whispered back. He turned away from Dave as he looked at his lifeless body one last time, then disappeared with Leena through the exit of the morgue._

**\- - -**

I felt something big get lodged in my throat as I remembered the morgue scene. I swallowed it down before it consumed me. I looked back up at my Uncle John. He was shaking and his lip was quivering furiously, it took him everything he had not to break down. I knew the pain he was feeling. We all did. I bit my lip hard, almost enough to draw blood but not quite. I just wanted everything to stop. I wanted everyone to stop crying and being sad. I wanted to bring Dave back, and my mom too while I was at it. I could have burned a hole in the casket the way I stared at it. I kept waiting and waiting for Dave to open his casket and reveal that everything was just a joke and he got us all so bad. Then mom would come out from behind a tree and say she was in cahoots. I just kept waiting and waiting.

 

But that moment never came.

 

Tears rolled freely now. I didn’t even bother to hide them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm uploading more chapters as you read this.


	3. Chapter 3

===> [F] Dave: Hold your newborn baby girl.

 

_Dave smiled, happy tears rolled down his cheeks. He set his aviators down on his seat so he can see his daughter clearly. His hands were shaking as the nurse set the pink bundle in his arms._

_“Congratulations Mr.Strider. She’s a little early but a completely heathy little girl.”_

_“Leena..” Dave whispered. He’d held babies before, but this wasn’t the same. He had created this one. This one wasn’t fussy or Whiney, he wasn’t eager to dump the kid on someone else. Actually, he could hold her forever as she snuggled into his chest._

_He heard baby Leena give a tiny sigh and he could swear his heart stopped. Dave walked over to the bed where Jade was laying, absolutely exhausted. Her hair sticking to her face from sweat and her cheeks flushed from exhaustion._

_“Say hello to our daughter babe,” Dave said, beaming with pride and adoration._

_“She’s beautiful…” Jade whispered in her tiny worn out voice, tears brimming in her eyes.She lifted her hand to reach out to her daughter but for some reason it didn’t quite make it. Her hand fell and her body suddenly went limp. Before Dave knew it, Jade was being wheeled out of the room and Leena was being stripped swiftly from his arms._

_He felt paralyzed. He could only watch as his fiancé was taken away as the doctors shouted._

_“Her hearts stopped! Get me the paddles! Theres still time!”_

_Dave fell to his knees. Why is this happening? He thought to himself. He wasn’t sure, but he knew he couldn’t lose Jade. Not like this, not so soon._

**\- - -**

****A strange noise caught my attention. It was the casket, being lowered into the ground. The preacher was done talking and was ushering people into the church. Everyone slowly made their way inside, except for me. I stood there, shivering, watching as my dad was lowered slowly in the hole.

This would be the last time I would ever be this close to him. And he was so far away. Once he was completely inside, I peeked over the edge. My aviators almost fell in, they slid down my face, too big for me to wear. But the perfect size for my dad and Ben Stiller. I’d never change them though, not one bit.

I looked at the two headstones and read them to myself; “Jade Harley. Loving mother, wife, ecto-sister, ecto-grandmother, and ecto-granddaughter.” And there was one more thing engraved, it was currently covered in snow but I remembered the tiny cursive scrawl, “Witch of Space”. Right in the center of the headstone was a weird spirally thing. I didn’t understand what it meant, I wouldn’t ask either. I looked to the next headstone, the one in front of me; “Dave Strider. Loving father, husband, brother, and ecto-son. Also king of sick nasty fires.” His also had a symbol, it was a gear instead of a spiral though. Then below all of that, in the same cursive scrawl, “Knight of Time”.

I didn’t understand half of the things on the tombstones. But I didn’t care to. It wouldn’t bring them back.

 

===> [F] Dave: Hear what the doctors have to say.

 

_Dave sat in the waiting room impatiently, his fingers tapped furiously on the seat as he waited and waited._

_They wouldn’t tell him anything, they wouldn’t let him see little Leena. They wouldn’t tell him if Jade was okay. All they said was that he had to stay seated or leave the hospital and there was no fucking way in hell that was happening._

_Dave thought about his life, if he had included all the time jumps he’d done he was well past the age of 20. Probably around 23. But that was too complicated to keep up with. He had lived through a lot and his world was so different now then it was when he was younger. He had a fiancé-soon to be wife, he had his family of Rose, Bro, and Ms.Lalonde, his two best friends John and Karkat, and the rest of his close friends, the majority trolls. He’d seen the end of the world multiple times, he’d seen the death of almost all of his friends, and he’d seen them all come back to life. He watched his world be destroyed and he created a new one._

_His world was so large, yet it fit into one tiny pink bundle._

_A tiny pink bundle that these fucking doctors were keeping from him._

_“Mr.Strider?”_

_Dave looked up, he realized that his fingers had stopped tapping and had formed a fist._

_“Yes, that’s me,” he said, standing quickly, “What’s the news doc? How are my girls? A-are they okay?” His girls. It felt right when he said it._

_“Well we had some complications with Mrs.Strider,”_

_“Harley.” Dave corrected._

_“Harley. My apologies. But as I was saying, her heart had failed due to the stress of the pregnancy. She had actually died for a whole three minutes,” the doctor said._

_Dave’s face paled, his hearing went fuzzy and his sight went blurry. Died? Just the thought of living without her almost sent him over the edge right there._

_“But luckily our staff worked fast enough to bring her back. She should be okay now, but her heart is really weak and always will be. She needs to be careful from here on out.” The doctor talked more but Dave wasn’t listening, he was too focused on seeing Jade and his bundle._

_“What about my bun- I mean, Leena. Is she okay?”_

_“The baby? Yes she’s fine. She’s in the room with Mrs.Harley right now.”_

_Normally Dave would have asked to see them but he didn’t want their fucking permission. Fuck etiquette, his girls were waiting for him. He walked past the doctor and proceeded to the room with his life and his world._

\- - -

“Leena? Come inside dear, it’s too cold out here.” I turned around to see Kanaya waiting for me patiently. I pushed the aviators onto my face properly and wiped my nose. The snow was somewhat difficult to maneuver through, my height and tiny frame not helping. I stumbled and almost fell but Kanaya’s motherly arms caught me and she helped me inside.

It was so toasty, I could feel my red nose warming up and I wriggled it just to make sure it was there. I looked around at all the faces, all somber and sullen. All except one, she looked more confused then anything else.

“Everyone here needs to cheer up,” Aradia said.

“What the fuck ith there to be tho cheery about Aradia? Pleath. Enlighten me,” Sollux hissed (more like lisped) at her.

“Well, don’t think of it as a funeral, think of it as…” Aradia pondered.

“Oh Gog fucking Aradia n-” Sollux tried to stop her but it was too late.

“Corpse Party!!!” Aradia shouted, putting her hands out and doing a small dance. Everyone stared, Sollux in horror.

“Oh shit? It’s a motherfuckin party?” Gamzee wondered aloud, “Here I thought this was a motherfuckin funeral of sorts. Well, I have some fuckin Faygo and pies in the ca-“

“No pies!!!” almost everyone shouted in unison. Sollux got Aradia to stop dancing and Tavros had to explain to his matesprit Gamzee that there wasn’t a party, just a misunderstanding. Had it been under different circumstances, I would have laughed. But I’ve lost the motivation to even smile. It just took too much effort. In a way, I was happy Aradia had her little outburst. It had broke the tension in the room and everyone stopped tiptoeing around each other. Thank God Aradia didn’t know how to act a certain social gatherings.

I weaved through everyone swiftly and unnoticed, searching, I don’t know exactly for who but I knew I’d know the face when I found it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have up to chapter 6 completed but im tired.  
> the rest will be uploaded asap


	4. Chapter 4

I couldn’t find the face, which was disappointing. But I did bump into a face I hadn’t seen in a long time. Eridan Ampora. The wizard troll smiled at me fondly. “Little Leena! Howw’vve you been? Its been too long. I’m happy to see you, despite the circumstance. You’vve growwn quite a bit. And you’re just as pretty as your mother,” he spoke, reminiscing.

Before I got a chance to reply, Sollux cut in;

“Holy thit Ampora. Are you theriouthly hitting on Leena? Gog damn I would think you would have filled at leath THOME quadrenth by now.”

“I’m not fucking hitting on her you freak! And I’ll havve you know my ‘quadrenth’ are filled. I wwould havve thought you fixed your childhood lisp. But no, you still sound like a fucking retard,” Eridan snapped back.

Sollux swiftly walked toward Eridan, prepared to kick his ass, but luckily Aradia and Feferi intervened quickly between the two, diffusing the fight quickly. I wondered if they were Kismesis. They sure as hell seemed like it. I figured they probably were, and it was cute. In a weird way.

I quickly spotted another troll relationship, matesprits this time. Sollux and Aradia. But I had known this already, they had a kid too, same age as me. He was a good friend of mine, one of my best friends actually. But to any outsider, it may seem as if Feferi was Sollux’s matesprit, the way she looked at him. I remember mom telling me about them once, that Feferi ended it with them because she didn’t want to get in the way of Sollux’s happiness with Aradia. It was a sad story. But they all were happy in the end, for the most part.

 

===> [F] Karkat: Get the call.

 

_Karkat was arguing with Terezi again. But this time, the argument was serious._

_“Why are we even together still Karkat?” Terezi said exasperated. “We want totally different things in the relationship. You don’t even want to be with me do you?”_

_“What the fuck Terezi?! Of course i want to be with you! I love you more than anything.”_

_“Then let’s get married, let’s have kids, lets fucking do something…”_

_“I’m not going to have some fucking wriggler and we’re only 10 sweeps old! Just because strider has to rush his shit doesn’t mean we have to! Why do you even want to? We’ve been together how many sweeps? And you’ve been fine.”_

_“I just…. I feel like we’re drifting apart… Maybe it’s a sign? Maybe we should just-” Terezi’s suggestion was cut off by Karkat’s cellphone ringing._

_Karkat answered the phone quickly so Terezi couldn’t finish, she sighed and returned to the bedroom. “Hello? strider? Why the fuck are you calling me? It’s 2 in the fucking morning, there was a chance that I was sleeping you know. You’re a father? Yeah, Ive fucking known this, you’ve been one for 8 months now because you didn’t use your pail right. What? Of course I know how humans reproduce you fucking asshole. Wait what? She had the baby? Holy fucking Christ I’ll be on my way right now. Oh they won’t? Okay, i guess I’ll see you in the morning.” Karkat hung up his phone. His best friend just had a baby. And his matesprit might be leaving him. He could just tell it was gonna be a long day._

**\- - -**

After the memorial service and burial, everyone went to a nearby bar. I followed my uncle John to his car and slipped in the passenger seat. As I was putting on my seatbelt John handed me something, it was in a brown bag, it was a case to a movie, or a game. I suspected it to be an old crappy movie that he always cornered me into watching when I was younger.

“Happy Thirteenth Birthday Leena, it’s a few days late… But I hope you like it.” He hadn’t looked at me once while talking, or handing me the parcel. I opened it up carefully, not sure what to expect. It was a double disk PC game, some sort of zombie slaying RPG. I smiled for the first time in a while, I can’t tell if it was for the gift or if it was for John, he seemed to need a smile or two thrown his way.

“Thanks uncle John, I love it,” I thanked him and got a lopsided grin in return. I also decided that my smile was for him, he was such a great uncle, he didn’t deserve to have all of this thrown on his shoulders.

When we pulled up to the bar I heard a sigh and John mutter words under his breath, I only caught a few words which were barley audible, “Karkat.” and “angry drunk”. I didn’t really get it, my other uncle was angry most of the time, so to be even angrier while drunk would be quite a feat.

We walked in and I snuck in behind John since they didn’t allow kids, but as soon as we were in I took off on my own, pulling out my iPhone to check my pesterchum.

—artisticTerror [AT] started pestering grimZombie [GZ]—

AT: hey zelda! i know you told me to stay linear with you because of time zones and all but it’s a little too late and i’m typing this already so it’s going to be sent.

AT: there. i sent it so there’s no going back. AT: not like i can pull out the ocraina of time and take it back. AT: not that i would, i’m bored as fuck and you need to reply mate!

AT: arg! i’ll get back to you i guess.

AT: or just bug navi.

—artisticTerror ceased pestering grimZombie—

—artisticTerror [AT] began pestering grimZombie [GZ]—

AT: fuck. AT: navi just told me about……

AT: so i guess that means you’re…..

AT: fuck…….. shit :(

AT: sorry Zelda….. i didn’t know

I’m guessing that Travix told him about my dad. I wasn’t sure if I wanted Zack to even know, he lived out so far in Australia, he really didn’t need to know. If Travix wasn’t hiving and wheezing at home sick I would surely rip him a new one. As a matter of fact, I’d rip him one right now through his chum.

—grimZombie [GZ] began pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

GZ: Hey Travix. What the actual fuck man. Like seriously? It’s called fucking personal business.

GZ: You don’t go spreading it around like your fucking mutated ass hive honey you just happen to be allergic to.

GZ: What’s with that by the way? You’re allergic to it but you’re fucking obsessed with it. So now you’re all broke out in hives sniffling like a baby.

GZ: Or a wriggler. What ever the fuck trolls are when their young.

GZ: You’re such a fucking shit excuse for a troll.

LF: What’6 m0tivating y0u t0 keep pe6tering me even th0ugh y0u have lack of re6p0n6e?

LF: 0h wait, I kn0w.

LF: Y0u want my bulge.

GZ: Oh God…

GZ: Travix stop. Before I get my funeral dressed ass to your house and beat your honey hive covered face in with my foot.

LF: Y0u’re totally hitting 0n me.

GZ: Travix.

GZ: No.

GZ: What the fuck kind of name is Travix by the way? It’s like, almost normal. But then it’s not.

GZ: Your parents must not love you.

LF: Fuck you Lee.

LF: And n0t in the way y0u’re g0ing f0r, a6 much a6 I appreciate y0ur advance6 I’m g0ing t0 have t0 decline.

LF: Y0u 6eem to be u6ing me a6 a way t0 channel y0ur em0ti0n6.

GZ: Wow.

GZ: I’m speechless.

GZ: Your handle name sucks by the way.

GZ: It fits you.

LF: My dad hacked me again.

LF: He w0nt even hint 0n h0w t0 fix it.

LF: 6ince y0u’re there with him maybe he c0uld tell y0u.

LF: thi6 particular handle he ch06e wa6 a little har6h.

LF: Even th0ugh he’6 my dad, he’6 a bit 0f an, f0r lack 0f a better w0rd.

LF: a66h0le. I laughed to myself, Sollux was pretty hard on his kid and hacked him weekly. This time in particular was rather rude, but it wasn’t the worst he’s ever done to poor Travix. I settled in my bar stool more and replied.

GZ: Yeah no problem man. I’ll pry that shit out of him like there is no tomorrow. Dissecting that shit like its a 7th grade science project. LispingFaggot shall be no more.

LF: Thank6 lee. I 0we y0u 0ne.

—grimZombie [GZ] ceased pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

—grimZombie [GZ] began pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

GZ: Fuck whoops.

GZ: But yeah. You sure fucking do.

GZ: I gotta go message Zack back. And hack into your dad.

GZ: Ollie’s outie.

—grimZombie [GZ] ceased pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

I decided against getting back to Zack right away, I didn’t want to deal with him and his Zelda-ness quite yet. So I decided to hunt down Sollux. He was wrangling in a tipsy Aradia, her deep red dress flowy and beautiful. She was all giggles and hiccups by the time I reached them, resting her head contently on he husbands shoulder.

It’s only been about 20 minutes and Aradia was already drunk. She was an extreme lightweight. But everyone was in a much better mood now, more cheery and talkative. Aradia especially so, but she seemed more intent on getting her words to get Sollux in a separate room.

“I thwear to fucking Gog Aradia you have hormoneth like a fifteen year old.”

“Do you think they have buckets here?” Aradia whispered in his ear, Sollux flushed, his face getting hot from embarrassment instantly. That’s when Terezi decided to intervene by changing subjects, that’s when I took my chance to pry the hack from Sollux.

“Lisping Faggot?” I ask inquisitively.

“That’th a little mean of you. I’m thurley not harth enough to you to detherve to be called a faggot don’t you agree?” he chirped back knowing full well what I was implying.

“I’d agree it was a little harsh of you to say that about your son. He’d agree too.”

“He just thukths tho much though,” he joked, then sighed,

“But honethly, he needth to get hith act together about hith hacking. He’th not getting any better.”

“How do I get him to be able to change his handle?”

“Tell him it’th what I keep telling him about.”

“Thankth Solly,” I mocked laughing and hugged the tall skinny troll. He chuckled and hugged back gently before returning to tend to Aradia’s drunken advances.

—grimZombie [GZ] began pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

GZ: What has he been warning your ass about lately?

LF: 0h.

GZ: What was it?

LF: um.

GZ: Spill it Troll.

LF: “2top fuckiing wiith the honey 2tupiid a22.”

GZ: OHMYGOD. Are you serious?

GZ: That’s great though. I love your dad.

LF: Y0ur’6 i6 better. Let’6 trade.

GZ: …

LF: fuck. I’ll 6t0p talking n0w.

—grimZombie [GZ] ceased pestering lispingFaggot [LF]—

LF: I’m sorry Leena…

It was weird. And uncomfortable. All I wanted was to go hug my dad and reassure that he was mine and he wouldn’t be traded anytime soon for the troll equivalent of him. But I couldn’t, he was 6 feet under dirt and snow now. Just that thought sent millions more in my mind. What if he was cold? What if he was lonely? What if he couldn’t breathe, oh god, what if he was suffocating? My heart was racing and tears threatened to fall.

I just miss my daddy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is written in karkats POV

Another drink down, this day has been pretty shitty so far but if I had keep drinking at this rate I’ll be drunk in no time. Usually I wouldn’t care, it was just a routine. Fight with Terezi. Get to bar. Drink to forget fight. Get angry and violent. Fight with random people at the bar. Go home. Continue to be angry and violent. Have Terezi deal with it.

Don’t get me wrong, while me and Terezi fight, it’s never violent. No perigree in my life have I ever laid a hand on her (not including the tussles we got into as kids) and I never will. You’d have to be the lowest of the low to physically hurt your matesprit.

I sighed and took a look around the bar. All these old faces bring back so many damned memories. Good and bad. Despite what we all went through in the game, not too many of us were affected by it. Of course, the nightmares were substantially worse. And some of us were even traumatized from certain events. Gamzee, Eridan, Vriska, and even Rose are some pretty damn good examples on how the game fucked some of us up.

Gamzee’s level of self hate exceeds even mine. Which is a whole fucking lot. He can’t get over the fact he murdered half of us in his psychotic ass murdering spree. Or the fact that the parts of him that killed everyone still resurface. It’s hard for him to live Tavros, he’s come so close to almost culling him. Luckily for everyone he hasn’t, but he has painted his walls with the blood of a few trolls, even some humans. Even though those sick bastards all deserved it, Gamzee would have been culled for murder if it wasn’t for Feferi being the empress and pulling a few strings.

Vriska became a basket case. Mental and emotional break downs at least once a week. She’s off her fucking rocker. She lucked out by living with Egbert to pacify her, with out him she surely would have offed herself by now. I still don’t even understand what the fuck is exactly wrong with her, she acts like her normal bitchy snobby self around everyone and John is extremely tight lipped about whatever it is that goes down in the looney bin.

I think Eridan is the only one who isn’t completely fucking psycho out of the three trolls. But after the first two months of everyone finding each other, he just disappeared. It wasn’t up until a few years ago we heard from him again, though it was just reassuring us he was still breathing and wasn’t trying to kill the land dwellers again. Today is the first time we’ve actually physically seen him since he ran off, and he’s changed a lot. His stupid purple streak much more darker to match his blood. He’s ditched his cape and grown into his glasses. And without his cape shrouding his arms, you can clearly see whatever he’s been up to involved gaining muscle.

I sighed, we’re nothing more then a group of fucked up kids. I looked over at rose, she was drinking more then I was. She could handle it though, drinking runs in her family. I never did find out what it was that had her screws so loose, I always figured she’d be one of the few who got through fine in the end. But I was off by a long shot. If whatever it is,is enough to get Kanaya worked up and stressed out then it’s pretty bad.

Giggling came from the back of the bar. God damnit, it was Aradia again; she really needed to fucking lay off the booze. You would think that Sollux had anticipated this and kept her away from it. Shaking my head I looked to see what the freak was giggling about, she was standing with Eridan and Feferi, Sollux seemed to be elsewhere.

“Sooo. Errdin. You really sheem to sape up,err. Seemed to shape up. What were you doing out in God knows where anywhos?” Aradia slurred and hiccupped. She seemed to be getting more intoxicated the more she spoke.

“Things. They aint concerin’ you. All you need to worry about is where the fuck your no good matesprit is,” Eridan seemed to hiss, the bastards attitude never seems to change.

“Oh s’he should be ‘round somewhereee. But speaking a matespritship, you plan on filling fuhfree’s empty quedrant? Quaedrant. W’ever.”

“Aradia, I think you should really be looking for Sollux…” Feferi attempted to change the subject, poor girl.

“Shhhhhhh. Quit talking about ‘tholluthhhh’ for a god damed sec kay? I mean, I knooowww you’re still in love with ‘im and such since I emptied that quadrant. But SHHEEESSHHH!” Aradia exclaimed, she seriously has had WAY to fucking much to drink. I stood up to shut the god damned troll up before someone outside of our friends got involved. Aradia was talking to the fucking empress after all.

“ARADIA. FUCKING CHRITHT. SHUT YOUR GOD DAMNED MOUTH AND THOP DRINKING,” I heard Sollux yell as he made his way back to Aradia.

In response, Aradia planted a wet sloppy kiss on him, he tried pushing her off since her darker intentions were obvious, but she only forced more. When she finally pulled away she said something that even I was sort of shocked to hear.

“Even if I didn’t break your flush, you being empress would have. He’s a lowblood, you’re… you. It wouldn’t be allowed. So you should stop staring at him so longingly and get the fuck over it,” the venom in her voice was evident, heavy, it didn’t seem like the voice that spoke even belonged to her. I stepped back; I wasn’t really expecting this at all. For a brief moment I suspected kismesistude. But I quickly diminished the thought with my cheeks reddening at the mental image of Feferi and Aradia….. ‘kismesising’. Fuck why do I have to have such a perverse mind.

I looked at Feferi expecting hurt, but to my continual surprise, found her grinning with a hint of something more sinister.

“Fuck I’m tho thorry Fefi… The’th kind of a mean drunk…” Sollux lisped out, staring at the ground, he felt bad.

“Glub. It’s okay Solly, besides,” Feferi to a step a slight bit too close to Sollux than Aradia wanted and airily whispered in his ear loudly enough for anyone nearby to hear, “I’m still going to be the best pailing you ever had.”

The piisonic practically choked trying to swallow after he heard her statement, red and blue flickered just for half a second between his horns from him recalling the heated times spent with Feferi.

“You stupid glubbing gill faced bitch!” Aradia screeched lunging for Feferi. Sollux and Eridan got between the two quickly and pulled them far apart from each other. Other people in the bar were already starting to stare and if Aradia had laid one hand on the empress gog knows what the fuck they’d do.

I myself couldn’t help but snicker at the situation, fucking Aradia, a complete sweetheart most of the time, but the second you get some liquor in her, she tops Vriska on the bitch-o-meter.

I looked around and seen Leena, my heart practically stopped. She was sitting on a bar stool, staring blankly at her dark screen. She rubbed her eyes underneath her dad’s shades. She was crying. I stood up so I could go console the poor wiggler, but I was interrupted.

“Hey, fuck-blood. Tell that rust blood of yours to keep her fucking hands away from the Empress,” a deep voice growled at me. I turned to see a bigger troll with thick twisted horns which went all the way behind his head. He was standing with another troll and a human, the trolls were evidently high bloods who picked up a human to join their troupe. “Or that puke yellow blood she was with will be cleaning red off the walls for months.”

I stood up, I may have been on short side for a troll, but I still met eye to eye with the dickhead.

“Listen to me you worthless piece of shit. I’m not going to tell my friend anything. Why? Because you’re not going to do shit to her and you’re fucking lucky I don’t pull out my sickles right now and spill your blood all over the fucking floor. And if you even LOOK at any of my friends in a way that I don’t approve of, your boyfriends over there are going to have their heads so far up your fucking nook they’ll be able to lick your fucking think pan,” I hissed, surprisingly without shouting.

“Oh you think you’re fucking tough? How about I just shut you up for good right here and now and we can all see you shitty little blood color,” the big troll advanced forward but a long thin hand pushed back against his chest, hard enough to wear he stumbled backwards. The trolls eyes widened with fear when he realized who it was.

“I’d best motherfuckin advice you not to all up and do that brother. The Messiahs arn’t feeling very fucking merciful today. Especially if a motherfucker is threatening my morial,” Gamzee’s deep scratchy voice growled at the troll. The normal joking grin was lost on his face. His eyes were dark, face serious, I was pretty fucking positive that if the troll even thought about disobeying Gamzee’s order he would be dead where he stood. A dark smile crept on my face; we all knew that as high as he was on the spectrum, Gamzee was higher.

“B-but a low blood like _him_ in a quadrant, as pale as it may be, with _you_?” he stammered out.

“You’d be motherfuckin’ surprised.”

The troll backed down, him and his friends left the bar through the back, I heard him grumbling something about if the highblood wasn’t there he would have snapped my neck like a twig. He probably could too, if I let him. But that wouldn’t happen anytime soon.

“Fucking ingrates. I should have fucking culled him on the spot,” I grumbled. No body insults my fucking friends but me.

“Naw, brother. That wouldn’t be any good for no body. It’d make too much of a motherfucking mess,” Gamzee joked. I chuckled. “But seriously, why didn’t you just all tell that motherfucker your shade? He would have backed down, he is lower on the motherfuckin rainbow wheel then you.”

“I’m not like all you cocky assholes. I don’t flaunt around my blood color because if someone is going to fucking back down in a fight, it’s going to be because of my fucking badassness not because I have fancy blood,” I replied, a bit more harshly then I wanted to. But Gamzee was undeterred, as always. I walked past him to look for Leena but his arm snaked around to my chest and stopped me.

He leaned down to my ear, “You don’t have to hide it anymore. There’s no more reason to be all scared.”

I pushed him off of me, “I’m not fucking scared Gamzee. Just go hang out with Nepeta or some shit.” He just mumbled and walked away. I would never admit it, but he was right. I was still scared, terrified. I had lived my entire life in fear of anyone knowing that I had mutant blood. Which turned out wasn’t mutant at all, not in the least. It’s on the spectrum all right, sitting its candy red ass right on the fucking top. But the previous empress, the batter ~~bitch~~ WITCH, had been in so much fear of losing the throne that she took off the shade entirely, making it mutant. If Feferi hadn’t thrown over The Condesce we never would have known. But it didn’t change anything for me, I’m not going to fucking get all excited because I’m a fucking highblood now, I’ve always been a leader anyway so this didn’t change shit. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to take the throne; Feferi can deal with that shit. The only thing it did was turn Equius into a fucking mess when I just inhaled the same air as him and had every fucking troll who knew about my blood color blubbering over themselves trying to please me.

I just wanted to fucking be normal. Not treated like a freak or like a god. Just goddamn normal.

Finally pushing past everyone, avoiding conversation, I noticed Leena wasn’t on the barstool anymore. I searched around and seen the door to the front exit closing and a swish of strawberry blonde hair. I practically ran to the door to get to her.

“Leena, Leena you can’t just fucking run out like that. There are some fucking physco’s around here. You could get-“ I was cut off by a stifled sob. Fuck. She was crying.

She was just sitting on the snowy ground in the parking lot next to Egbert’s car, her phone discarded on the ground next to her, she didn’t even bother to captchalogue  it into her sylladex. She was just slumped over herself on her knees, shivering and crying into her hands. I walked up slowly to her and sat in the snow next to her. I didn’t say a word, just sat my ass in the cold fucking snow, leaned against the car, and was silent.

She cried a little more then threw her arms around my neck and sobbed into my shirt. Her chest heaving, her breath catching, she was a mess. I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly, tears welling in my own eyes.

I felt the frames of her shades press into my chest as she cried more. It was a good 15 minutes before she could talk coherently.

“I-I…. I tried so hard. S-so hard kitty. I took care of him as b-best as I could… He just wouldn’t get better,” she continued to sob harder and I felt tears streaming down my face.

“Leena it’s not your fucking fault,” I tried soothing her.

“Yes it is! M-mom left. S-she left me to take care of dad. But I couldn’t… I c-couldn’t make him happy again. I w-wasn’t good enough. A-a-and now….he’s gone...” her voice cracked and hitched as she tried to control herself.

“Leena no. Your dad was a fucking retard, but he loved you so much. You and your mom were the best things that ever happened to him. You made him unbelievably happy,” I spoke softly into her hair.

“Then why did he leave?” Leena’s voice was just a barely audible whisper now. She was shaking violently from the cold and her crying.

“He wasn’t strong enough to live without her.”

I couldn’t tell if she accepted the answer or not, but she just lay limply in my lap, her head snuggled into my neck and shoulder. I felt her chest go up and down; her breathing slowed down significantly still irregular and hitched but calmer now. Tears still streamed freely down her cheeks. Tears still streamed freely down mine.

We had been there for about an hour, the sun had set, and at one point I thought she was sleeping but I had noticed her long eyelashes blink from behind her shades. God she looked so fucking much like Dave. It hurt me just to look at her. It hurt knowing he was gone. It hurt knowing Jade was gone too. Everything just fucking hurt.

Eventually I heard footsteps crunching through the snow towards us. The black dress shoes indicated it was Egbert. He set his hand on my shoulder. “Karkat?”

I didn’t answer, I didn’t move, I didn’t even look up. I noticed it started snowing again. John leaned down to pick up Leena. A low growl came from my throat which surprised even me. But I didn’t care; he wasn’t taking her away from me.

“Karkat it’s cold out here. Let me just take her home,” he tried reasoning. But I wouldn’t hear it. She was small, and vulnerable, if she left my arms she could get hurt again. And I’d rather have Jack kill me a million times before I ever let her get hurt again. It was my sole job to protect her, I didn’t know why I felt so strongly suddenly, but it doesn’t matter, she would be safe as long as I was around.

Before John could argue, Kanaya was there. She pressed a finger to her lips, shooshing him. He sighed. He couldn’t argue with her, no one could.

She leaned down towards me and Leena, before I could stop myself another growl instinctively escaped. But she didn’t pay any mind to it, she wasn’t taking Leena from me, she was helping me stand up. I realized the snow numbed my ass and legs. I wobbled and almost fell but her hands helped me stay straight with Leena in my arms.

I adjusted her slightly and she snuggled closer to me, wanting to leave as much as I wanted her to let go. I turned my face into her, trying to hide the tears I felt welling up but Kanaya’s soft hands caught me a rubbed my tears away gently with her thumb. She leaned over and lightly kissed me on the cheek, murmuring softly into my ear. Fuck, she’d be such a great mom. It like, runs in her blood or something, she’s so perfect at it. It’s almost like breathing for her.

“I’ll drive her home. Terezi isn’t coming back with me tonight; she’s staying with Nepeta for right now. And John is driving back with Vriska. So I can take her,” I said, you can almost hear the desperation in my voice. Almost.

John nodded and Kanaya just smiled fondly. I walked to my car and set Leena in the passenger seat. She curled on her side and closed her eyes. I walked over and started the car and sat patiently waiting for John so I could follow him to his house to drop off Vriska, then to Leena’s.

As soon as I started driving the car pushed warm air on us both, it felt like fucking Christ. I didn’t realize how cold it was. I reached back and grabbed my specially alchemized purple and green sopor blanket and tossed it on her. She instantly curled into it.

Finally pulling up to her house I sighed. The drive hadn’t been long enough. I wish I had more time with her, just silent in the car as she slept so peacefully. I walked around and got her out of the car, the sopor blanket wrapped around her to defend her from the chill. She snuggled into me and I felt warmth radiate through my body.

John walked towards me to get Leena, yeah fucking right. “Back the fuck up Egbert. I fucking got this.” He didn’t argue. Just obliged.

I walked into the Strider home, it felt so fucking wrong. Pictures of Jade, Dave, and Leena laughing and smiling in photos, mainly Jade grinning and Dave and Leena with the famous Strider straight face. The house so empty and untouched, the living room clean, the kitchen slightly array, but what do you expect with a 13 year old doing all the cooking and cleaning. I walked down the long hall past the staircase to Leena’s room. I opened the door without stirring her and then leaned over to set her in her bed.

Her arms tightened around my neck and she gave my jaw a goodnight kiss and whispered to me sleepily, “Goodnight daddy. Love you.”

My heart clenched, almost stopped. “Goodnight Lee, I love you. I’ll see you later,” I whispered back and kissed her forehead. She faintly smiled and snuggled her pillow and wrapped my green blanket around her more.

Before I left I removed the shades and set them on her nightstand. Then I turned and walked away, leaving the door cracked behind me. Egbert looked as if he wanted to say something, but I glared at him and he quickly returned to his makeshift bed on the couch.

As I was driving home I thought about the events of not just today, but the last few years. The thoughts overwhelmed me and I pulled over. I punched my steering wheel out of frustration and broke down crying into my arms.

Why was this happening? What the fucking hell did I do to deserve this? What did Leena do? When we scratched the game that was supposed to be the end of it. We were supposed to have out smarted it. We got through the fucking game. Why were people still dying.

I couldn’t stop the tears. I thought about Jade, she was the derpiest fucking girl in the world, all teeth and glasses. But she could put a smile on anyone’s face. And Dave, he was a bigger fucking asshole then I was. But he was my one of my bestfriends. I loved that kid; he got me through a lot.

And Leena, _oh god_ _Leena_ , he poor fucking girl had lost both of her parents. She was the sweetest fucking wriggler out there. She didn’t deserve to watch her parents die like we did.  More tears. They were racing down my face, dripping off my chin, pale red staining my cheeks.

I thought we beat the fucking game. But nothing changed.


	6. Chapter 6

Waking up was a pain in the ass, I felt sore, tired, and drained. When the memories of yesterday resurfaced I felt broken instantly. It took everything I had not to cry. I scrambled to get up and rush to the shower.

Once inside I couldn’t help but cry, the warm water mixing with my salty tears. My mom and dad were gone. And no matter what I did there wasn’t anything to bring them back. Lying in their graves, cold, alone. No, they weren’t alone. They had eachother. Dave Strider and Jade Harley, together till the end.

The thought only brought more tears; I wish they didn’t leave me. I need them so much. Why did this have to happen? Why did they have to be taken from me? What had I done wrong…?

 

==> [F] Dave: Spend Quality Time With Your Family.

_Dave sat on the couch, he was exhausted as hell. He had been watching his daughter while Jade was out. And ever since she learned to crawl she wouldn’t stop moving. So instead of chasing her around Dave rearranged the furniture around the house blocking all open entries and exits to the hallway, kitchen, bathroom, and anywhere else the tike might find._

_Dave heard keys jingle and the front door open and grinned as Jade walked into the house._

_“O-oh my. Redecorating much Dave?” Jade laughed, setting her things to the side and collapsing on the couch next to Dave. He leaned over and gave her a welcome home kiss, she giggled girlishly and tweaked his nose._

_“Baby proofed the main rooms. The little chick has no chance of getting her tiny little baby prints on anything now. Completely striderfied,” Dave boasted._

_“Baby proof huh?” Jade said grinning, “I didn’t think that was in the Striders list of skills.”_

_“Oh you’d be surprised babe.”_

_“In speaking of baby… Where’s Leena?”_

_“Oh shit.” Dave’s face paled, focused on redecorating, he had forgotten about the crawling crazy kid._

_They both leapt from the couch and went into a frantic search for the baby before she could get ahold of the numerous guns or swords lying around the house. Why they kept dangerous objects in reach of a curious baby, was a mystery._

_“Holy fucking shit!” Jade screeched. Dave sprinted over to her, leaping over the couch that was halfway in the hallway. Dave ran to the bedroom to find Jade standing up on the bed holding a giggling baby with a look of horror on her face. “Do you think this is funny? You did that on purpose didn’t you!” Jade yelled at Dave._

_“What are you talking about Harley?” Dave asked eyes scanning the room._

_“THAT DAVE. THAT RIGHT THERE IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT. THAT, THAT THING,” Jade screeched pointing to something halfway sticking out from under the bed._

_Dave started laughing, he didn’t even want to hide how funny he found this situation. “Babe, it’s only Lil ‘Cal,” Dave chuckled as he picked up the puppet. “How the fuck did he get here though. Isn’t bro out of town?” Jade screeched again. “Jesus christ. I get it! I’ll take him out to the living room or something.”_

_“Try the dump! That thing is freaky.”_

_“Hell no! Little Cal is cool. He’s cooler then cool. If cool was a can of fruit juice he’d be the fucking cool aid man. Except instead of busting through walls and shit he’d be sneaking in their windows like a fucking ninja and replacing all their beverages with cool aid. And eventually no one would get sick of cool aid. Ever.”_

_“Dave just fucking take it out of here already.”_

_Dave just rolled his eyes and took lil cal into Leena’s room, tossing him into the crib. He laughed to himself. Shit was ironic._

_Only later that night he heard Harley screech again when she went to check on the baby and found the puppet instead._

**\---**

After I left the shower and got dressed, I made my way to the living room. Uncle John was still passed out, mouth agape, glasses askew, and drooling. He was a wild sleeper but still managed to keep his glasses on his face. I picked up his glasses gently and set them on the coffee table.

I went to the kitchen and started to make a breakfast for me and him, to hopefully lighten the tension that would inevitably be there. After about 15 minutes I heard a rustling then footsteps toward the kitchen.

“Morning,” John yawned tiredly.

“I think it’d be more of an afternoon.”

“Same difference.”

“That doesn’t even make any sen-“ I started.

“Shhoosh. Only food now,” he cut off making his way to the eggs.

I sighed and sat with him at the table. As I suspected, it was awkward and tense. We were both avoiding the huge elephant in the room. It was awhile before he finally said something.

“So um, after you’re done eating and stuff, you should pack some clothes. Since you’ll be staying with me and Vris for awhile.”

I stayed quiet.

“You don’t need to pack everything though. We’ll make regular stops and shit. The house isn’t going anywhere. Bro doesn’t want to let go of it right away, so he’s just gonna pay it off.”

“Why?”

“I dunno. I think he’s just some house hoarder or something.”

“He should just let this place go. It’s just filled with the ghosts of people who aren’t going to be around anymore. Him keeping it isn’t going to bring them back or keep their memory around. It’s just going to remind everyone that they’re gone and this is all that’s left.”

John tensed. He swallowed even though he wasn’t eating. His hands started to tremble.

“You should go pack Leena.”

His voice was flat. I had upset him. I didn’t mean to, but people can’t just tiptoe around the fact that they’re both gone. It just makes it harder to accept.

 

When we got to Uncle John’s apartment, my stomach dropped. It was finally sinking in that I would be living with him now. Not only that, but I would be living with Vriska too.  I wish I could turn the car around myself and just go hide in my bed. I’ve heard storied about Vriska. And frankly she scared the fuck out of me.

Following John up the stairs, my heart started racing more and more. So much could go wrong, if she doesn’t like me she could make my life hell. And what would happen even if she did like me? She threw Tavros off a cliff when she had a crush on him.

I was practically sweating when I got to the door, my palms clammy. I rubbed them on my shirt and noticed I still had my dad’s shades. I slipped them on and felt my nerves calm. Dad could handle her. So could I. I think.

“Joooooooohn! There you are! It took you forever to get here!” I heard a voice complain from inside.

“Jeeze Vriska you do realize I actually have to drive here right? I can’t just snap my fingers and be here.”

“You’d be a lot cooler if you did. And you blew me off for movie night last night so you can make it up to me by cleaning the house next week.” She grinned and hopped off of the couch, giving me a better look at the troll. She was dressed lazily, jeans, tanktop, and her long black hair in a messy ponytail. She didn’t seem threating in the least.

“Vriska what the hell. I had things to do, and it’s not even my week!” John tried to argue.

“John, how am I supposed to trust you to not blow me off anymore if you won’t do this? This is the only way.”

John groaned and rolled his eyes, “Whatever Vris.” He looked over at me and seemed slightly startled as if he had forgotten that I was there. “Oh yeah, Leena your room is right down the hall,” he said motioning towards a dark hallway, “You can throw your stuff in there.”

I made my way towards my new room, and noticed Vriska was watching me. Scanning me to see if I’d be any use of her, I was worried of what she’d decide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was a bit shorter then the others? It was hard to decide where to go with it. But I got it down now. I should be updating more frequently now. Constructive criticism would be lovely. I am trying to improve my writing skills a great deal. So yeah, thanks~


	7. Chapter 7

Living with Vriska and John was okay, I mean, it was something to get used to of course, but it wasn’t as horrible as I imagined. Vriska ignored me for the most part. Sometimes, I think she just outright forgot I was there. After the first couple days I thought she would have remembered that there was a whole other human being in her home. I guess I was wrong.

“Hey Vriskers, can you watch Leena? I’m going to be out for a while and I don’t want to leave her here on her own,” John said as he was sliding on his coat.

“Who?” Vriska looked genuinely puzzled, I would have laughed but I was insulted that John believed I needed a babysitter.

“Leena. You know. The thirteen year old girl who’s been living with us for about a week now?”

“Oh. Her. Yeah go ahead do whatever,” she said waving him away. She seemed to immersed on whatever was on the TV screen.

“I don’t need a babysitter Uncle John.”

“Yes you do, you’re still a baby. Ish. Kid. Thing.”

“Woah you have such a way with words Egbert. I’m taken aback with your astonishing vocabulary. Honestly, someone call the news because your shit just hit me like a hurricane. I’m blown away,” I mocked in deadpan.

He didn’t seem as amused as he usually was when I did that. He seemed sort of, irritated. He shook his head and muttered, turning to leave. “I’ll be gone until tomorrow or something. I’ll see you then.”

“I was just playing John, no need to get-“ I was cut off by him slamming the door. What the hell was his problem?

“It’s because you sound like the Dave kid,” Vriska had spoken out from her spot on the couch. I guess she wasn’t as preoccupied as I thought.

“What do you mean?”

“I meeeeeeeean, when you talk, you sound like your man-lusus. And you remind John of him a lot. Frankly you’re a walking image of Dave. And Jade. So whenever John looks at you, he just sees his dead friends.”

“How would you know? I mean, you weren’t even close to my mom or dad. How the hell are you even this close to Uncle Egbert?” I walked to the living room and sat on the opposite chair.

“We just are. It’s complicated. And I may not have been close to your parents, but I know John well enough. Plus it’s always on the back of his mind, he’s always thinking about him. His sister and his best friend, he feels guilty about their death. And I can’t get him to do anything I want him to because of it. It’s really annoying. I dip into his head but all I can hear are his self-hating thoughts and him whining aaaaaaallllllll the time about it. Thank you for giving me that headache.”

I stared at her blankly. Was she kidding me? She just told me about John’s depression and then starts complaining because she can’t get him to make the bed?

“You’re fucking joking.”

“I wish I was. Anyways, I gotta go. I have more important shit to do then babysit a wriggler. All these irons all these fires. Need to be tended to. Have fun kid.” In a flash she was out the door.

I sat there thinking to myself for a moment, trying to absorb everything that I just heard. It was a lot to take in. Especially how Vriska said it like it was nothing. I got up and made my way to the bathroom. I slipped off my shades as I stared into the mirror; I finally got into the hang of wearing them all the time. Striders never show their eyes. At least that’s what my dad always tried to tell me. Mom said it was bullshit. But after the first weeks of school I was starting to figure out why exactly, “Striders never show their eyes.”

 

==> [F] Dave: Try and get your kid to stop crying.

 

_When Dave picked Leena up from Kindergarten he could already tell something was up. She didn’t run out to greet him, she didn’t blab about her day, he hadn’t even seen her smile since he got her. On the way home he heard a sniffle and looked over at her to see her rubbing her eyes. He sighed inwardly. After he talked with her he was probably going to kick some five year olds ass for giving his daughter cooties or whatever fucking fatal disease the kids were making up._

_But when it came around to talking about it, it was something he wasn’t expecting._

_“Hey kid, whats up? Some kid at school give you aids or something?” He had meant to say cooties. Close enough._

_“No..” her voice was small, quiet, and visibly upset._

_“Then what’s wrong?”_

_“They’re too bright.”_

_“What are?”_

_“My eyes. Their too bright. All the kids at school kept calling me a troll, or a freak. It’s because my dumb eyes are messed up.” She started crying and Dave lifted her into his arms, holding her close. He knew exactly what she was feeling; he went through the same thing._

_“Your eyes are gorgeous little chick. Just like you. Don’t let those little nooksniffers and assbags tell you different,” he said trying to console her._

_“But it’s true Daddy, my eyes are yellow. They’re not green like mommy’s or red like yours. They’re yellow. Only trolls have yellow eyes.”_

_“Actually they have grey eyes,” Dave tried to argue, but that made her cry even more. He wasn’t good at this whole parenting thing. And Jade was spending a day with John. It was ecto-siblings week or someshit holiday they made up._

_“Fuck Leena, I can’t convince you how awesome your eyes are can I?” He felt her shake her head, or rub snot on his shirt. He wasn’t sure, but he knew that he would have to be changing after this talk was settled. “You have Strider eyes, that’s the most badass thing ever.” More sobbing. “You know, I had the same problem when I was a tyke.”_

_“You…You did?”_

_“Yep. One day, I forgot my shades at home and when Bro picked me up, I was sniffling and sobbing; I ran crying right into his arms.”_

_“What did he do?”_

_“He slapped one of his shitty swords in my hand and told me to meet him on the roof for a strifing. Completely beat my ass. He doesn’t go easy, ever. I was only seven too.” Dave felt Leena stiff up. “But after that he gave me my shades back and told me not to forget them anymore. Striders never show their eyes he said.” Dave smiled, he missed bro. It’d been too long since he got his ass beat down by his big bro._

_Leena pushed Dave back at her tiny arm’s length to look at him in the eyes. “But dad… I don’t have any shades…” she mumbled weakly._

_Without hesitation Dave took off his own shades and plopped the on Leena’s small face. Instantly he was thanked with a cool aid stained smile. She pushed her messy hair out of her face excitedly, “How do I look daddy!?”_

_“You look fuckin’ ace. Bitches ain’t got shit on this lil Strider right here. No fuckin way.”_

_Leena giggled and hugged at her Dad’s neck he just chuckled and dropped her on the couch. And tossed her an xBox controller, she could do her shitty ass colorbook homework later._

_When Jade got home she was welcomed with squealing giggling little girl, trying to run to her whilst not dropping her oversized shades and tripping on her dad’s record shirt. Jade picked up her daughter and smiled giving her a hug and kissing her forehead._

_“Why hello princess.”_

_“I’m not princess, I’m a strider!” Leena giggled bubbly._

_Jade raised an eyebrow at her husband, who was sitting on the couch, shirtless, and shadeless. He could only offer up a shrug in return before jumping back into his game._

_“Oh dear. Well, how was your day sweetie?” Jade asked curiously, she had received a call from the school about Leena having a bullying issue. She had concluded from her daughters reactions that Dave had settled it._

_“It wasn’t fun at first, but then Daddy made it all better!!”_

_“Oh he did, did he?”_

_“Yeah! He gave me his super glasses, the ones that Uncle Egbert gave him!”_

_“Well that was nice of hi-“_

_“Now those assbags don’t have shit on me!”_

_Jade was speechless. She shot daggers over at Dave, who had stiffened in knowing he got ratted out for his foul language. “Dave…”_

_He absconded before Harley got the chance to rip him a new one._

 

**\---**

_  
_

The day went on as normal. Except it was quiet. So quiet it started to bug me. I did as much as I could to keep my thoughts away, pesterchum with my friends and the hoard of shitty movies was the most I could work with. I was alone in the apartment until John showed up late the next day.

“Hey Leena, where’s Vriska?”

“Not sure, she bounced about twenty minutes after you left.”

“Damn. I should have figured.”

“What’s up between you and her anyways?” I asked; I had started to wonder after a while about them. They did share a room. And that was before I moved in.

“What?” he seemed caught off guard.

“Like, are you guys dating?”

“No!! No of course not, I mean. No. We’re definitely just friends.”

“Friends? Yeah right. You’ve kissed her before right?”

“Um. Uh. I guess…” his face started getting red. I pushed further.

“And I’m also guessing that you guys have had sloppy makeouts on more than one occasion?”

“Yeah, but-“

“And you guys share a bed. That implies a whole shit ton of other things.”

“Well, it’s a lot more complicated than that, we just… Wait a second I’m not talking about this with you! Jesus Leena. No. We are NOT having this conversation.” He shook his head and walked off to his room. I couldn’t help but laugh at how flustered he gets.

And not thirty minutes later the blue devil herself walked in. She didn’t bother acknowledging the kid she just abandoned for a day. She waltzed straight into the back shared bedroom with John.

I just muttered and grumbled. John could do better, sure she was gorgeous, but her personality was a pain in the ass. I went to my room and just lied flat on my bed for a little bit. I could hear John and Vriska arguing about something until I fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Living with Vriska and John was okay, I mean, it was something to get used to of course, but it wasn’t as horrible as I imagined. Vriska ignored me for the most part. Sometimes, I think she just outright forgot I was there. After the first couple days I thought she would have remembered that there was a whole other human being in her home. I guess I was wrong.

“Hey Vriskers, can you watch Leena? I’m going to be out for a while and I don’t want to leave her here on her own,” John said as he was sliding on his coat.

“Who?” Vriska looked genuinely puzzled, I would have laughed but I was insulted that John believed I needed a babysitter.

“Leena. You know. The thirteen year old girl who’s been living with us for about a week now?”

“Oh. Her. Yeah go ahead do whatever,” she said waving him away. She seemed to immersed on whatever was on the TV screen.

“I don’t need a babysitter Uncle John.”

“Yes you do, you’re still a baby. Ish. Kid. Thing.”

“Woah you have such a way with words Egbert. I’m taken aback with your astonishing vocabulary. Honestly, someone call the news because your shit just hit me like a hurricane. I’m blown away,” I mocked in deadpan.

He didn’t seem as amused as he usually was when I did that. He seemed sort of, irritated. He shook his head and muttered, turning to leave. “I’ll be gone until tomorrow or something. I’ll see you then.”

“I was just playing John, no need to get-“ I was cut off by him slamming the door. What the hell was his problem?

“It’s because you sound like the Dave kid,” Vriska had spoken out from her spot on the couch. I guess she wasn’t as preoccupied as I thought.

“What do you mean?”

“I meeeeeeeean, when you talk, you sound like your man-lusus. And you remind John of him a lot. Frankly you’re a walking image of Dave. And Jade. So whenever John looks at you, he just sees his dead friends.”

“How would you know? I mean, you weren’t even close to my mom or dad. How the hell are you even this close to Uncle Egbert?” I walked to the living room and sat on the opposite chair.

“We just are. It’s complicated. And I may not have been close to your parents, but I know John well enough. Plus it’s always on the back of his mind, he’s always thinking about him. His sister and his best friend, he feels guilty about their death. And I can’t get him to do anything I want him to because of it. It’s really annoying. I dip into his head but all I can hear are his self-hating thoughts and him whining aaaaaaallllllll the time about it. Thank you for giving me that headache.”

I stared at her blankly. Was she kidding me? She just told me about John’s depression and then starts complaining because she can’t get him to make the bed?

“You’re fucking joking.”

“I wish I was. Anyways, I gotta go. I have more important shit to do then babysit a wriggler. All these irons all these fires. Need to be tended to. Have fun kid.” In a flash she was out the door.

I sat there thinking to myself for a moment, trying to absorb everything that I just heard. It was a lot to take in. Especially how Vriska said it like it was nothing. I got up and made my way to the bathroom. I slipped off my shades as I stared into the mirror; I finally got into the hang of wearing them all the time. Striders never show their eyes. At least that’s what my dad always tried to tell me. Mom said it was bullshit. But after the first weeks of school I was starting to figure out why exactly, “Striders never show their eyes.”

 

==> [F] Dave: Try and get your kid to stop crying.

 

_When Dave picked Leena up from Kindergarten he could already tell something was up. She didn’t run out to greet him, she didn’t blab about her day, he hadn’t even seen her smile since he got her. On the way home he heard a sniffle and looked over at her to see her rubbing her eyes. He sighed inwardly. After he talked with her he was probably going to kick some five year olds ass for giving his daughter cooties or whatever fucking fatal disease the kids were making up._

_But when it came around to talking about it, it was something he wasn’t expecting._

_“Hey kid, whats up? Some kid at school give you aids or something?” He had meant to say cooties. Close enough._

_“No..” her voice was small, quiet, and visibly upset._

_“Then what’s wrong?”_

_“They’re too bright.”_

_“What are?”_

_“My eyes. Their too bright. All the kids at school kept calling me a troll, or a freak. It’s because my dumb eyes are messed up.” She started crying and Dave lifted her into his arms, holding her close. He knew exactly what she was feeling; he went through the same thing._

_“Your eyes are gorgeous little chick. Just like you. Don’t let those little nooksniffers and assbags tell you different,” he said trying to console her._

_“But it’s true Daddy, my eyes are yellow. They’re not green like mommy’s or red like yours. They’re yellow. Only trolls have yellow eyes.”_

_“Actually they have grey eyes,” Dave tried to argue, but that made her cry even more. He wasn’t good at this whole parenting thing. And Jade was spending a day with John. It was ecto-siblings week or someshit holiday they made up._

_“Fuck Leena, I can’t convince you how awesome your eyes are can I?” He felt her shake her head, or rub snot on his shirt. He wasn’t sure, but he knew that he would have to be changing after this talk was settled. “You have Strider eyes, that’s the most badass thing ever.” More sobbing. “You know, I had the same problem when I was a tyke.”_

_“You…You did?”_

_“Yep. One day, I forgot my shades at home and when Bro picked me up, I was sniffling and sobbing; I ran crying right into his arms.”_

_“What did he do?”_

_“He slapped one of his shitty swords in my hand and told me to meet him on the roof for a strifing. Completely beat my ass. He doesn’t go easy, ever. I was only seven too.” Dave felt Leena stiff up. “But after that he gave me my shades back and told me not to forget them anymore. Striders never show their eyes he said.” Dave smiled, he missed bro. It’d been too long since he got his ass beat down by his big bro._

_Leena pushed Dave back at her tiny arm’s length to look at him in the eyes. “But dad… I don’t have any shades…” she mumbled weakly._

_Without hesitation Dave took off his own shades and plopped the on Leena’s small face. Instantly he was thanked with a cool aid stained smile. She pushed her messy hair out of her face excitedly, “How do I look daddy!?”_

_“You look fuckin’ ace. Bitches ain’t got shit on this lil Strider right here. No fuckin way.”_

_Leena giggled and hugged at her Dad’s neck he just chuckled and dropped her on the couch. And tossed her an xBox controller, she could do her shitty ass colorbook homework later._

_When Jade got home she was welcomed with squealing giggling little girl, trying to run to her whilst not dropping her oversized shades and tripping on her dad’s record shirt. Jade picked up her daughter and smiled giving her a hug and kissing her forehead._

_“Why hello princess.”_

_“I’m not princess, I’m a strider!” Leena giggled bubbly._

_Jade raised an eyebrow at her husband, who was sitting on the couch, shirtless, and shadeless. He could only offer up a shrug in return before jumping back into his game._

_“Oh dear. Well, how was your day sweetie?” Jade asked curiously, she had received a call from the school about Leena having a bullying issue. She had concluded from her daughters reactions that Dave had settled it._

_“It wasn’t fun at first, but then Daddy made it all better!!”_

_“Oh he did, did he?”_

_“Yeah! He gave me his super glasses, the ones that Uncle Egbert gave him!”_

_“Well that was nice of hi-“_

_“Now those assbags don’t have shit on me!”_

_Jade was speechless. She shot daggers over at Dave, who had stiffened in knowing he got ratted out for his foul language. “Dave…”_

_He absconded before Harley got the chance to rip him a new one._

 

**\---**

_  
_

The day went on as normal. Except it was quiet. So quiet it started to bug me. I did as much as I could to keep my thoughts away, pesterchum with my friends and the hoard of shitty movies was the most I could work with. I was alone in the apartment until John showed up late the next day.

“Hey Leena, where’s Vriska?”

“Not sure, she bounced about twenty minutes after you left.”

“Damn. I should have figured.”

“What’s up between you and her anyways?” I asked; I had started to wonder after a while about them. They did share a room. And that was before I moved in.

“What?” he seemed caught off guard.

“Like, are you guys dating?”

“No!! No of course not, I mean. No. We’re definitely just friends.”

“Friends? Yeah right. You’ve kissed her before right?”

“Um. Uh. I guess…” his face started getting red. I pushed further.

“And I’m also guessing that you guys have had sloppy makeouts on more than one occasion?”

“Yeah, but-“

“And you guys share a bed. That implies a whole shit ton of other things.”

“Well, it’s a lot more complicated than that, we just… Wait a second I’m not talking about this with you! Jesus Leena. No. We are NOT having this conversation.” He shook head and walked off to his room. I couldn’t help but laugh at how flustered he gets.

And not thirty minutes later the blue devil herself walked in. She didn’t bother acknowledging the kid she just abandoned for a day. She waltzed straight into the back shared bedroom with John.

I just muttered and grumbled. John could do better, sure she was gorgeous, but her personality was a pain in the ass. I went to my room and just lied flat on my bed for a little bit. I could hear John and Vriska arguing about something until I fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

After living with John and Vriska for about a month I started getting into the pattern of things. Movie nights every Tuesday, if you miss it or you talk too much during the movie, you clean the dishes after. Other than that the house was pretty much a free for all. I didn’t exist to Vriska unless she needed me for something, which was never.

I was walking up the stairs thinking about today, I had hung out with Travix today. We were supposed to go see a movie, but Sollux decided to embarrass him and call it a date. To make matters worse Aradia tried explaining how there was nothing wrong with looking for a suitable matesprit. We had to run out of the house before we both died of embarrassment. After then, we both felt too awkward to even consider watching a movie together. So we just shuffled around the mall and made fun of people.

It was a good day, but it was pretty late now. The sun had well set and I didn’t see John’s car outside. I figured that the apartment was empty for the night. As I was opening the door something didn’t feel right. It felt, off somehow. And I was right. When I walked in I shut the door behind me, not bother to lock it in case I needed a fast exit.

The place was completely dark except the moon piercing through the windows. When my eyes adjusted I could clearly see the flipped couch, broken tv, shattered dishes, and on spattered on the walls was blue paint. It seems as if someone was trying to write on the walls with it. I couldn’t make out what it said.

“Vriska?” I called out when I heard shuffling in the back room. Then suddenly my mind was bombarded with loud yelling and screaming. The only words I could make out from it were “Get out” and “leave”. I cried out, I was too overwhelmed. I didn’t know what to do.

Then suddenly, everything was silent. I heard a shriek and then I was slammed against the wall. Vriska was glaring at me, her eyes searched my face, but unable to thoroughly because of my shades. She yelled in frustration only hitting me against the wall again. She was bleeding and it was obvious that she was crying. Washed out blue still on her cheeks.

“You don’t GET IT. Leena. You don’t fucking understand. You think you have it soooooooo hard because your lusus died. You keep blaming yourself for the death of them. BUT YOU DIDN’T KILL THEM. No. You have no fucking idea on what it’s like to kill people you care about.” She was glaring at me; she looked as if she would kill me at any second. But she seemed as if she’d fall apart as well.

“I-I… Vrisk-“

“SHUT UP,” she screeched, her tears starting to flow again. “Just… shut up… I killed them you know? First, I got into his mind, it wasn’t that hard. Then I had him go to her house. And then,” she tried stopping a broken sob, “And after she died, I blinded my bestfriend, then killed the other kid. It wasn’t that hard. The lance slid in so easy… God I was such a bitch. And they all forgave me… I don’t deserve them. I know they don’t entirely forgive me though. Or else they wouldn’t visit me every night.”

Before I could ask what she was talking about, she launched into a horrible vivid description.

“Do you know what it’s like to be burnt alive? Feeling your entire body heat up past the point severe pain and not being able to stop it? Smelling your hair and flesh burning? Screaming for it to stop but it only keeps going and getting worse? No? Well I do. And so does Aradia. Because I put her through that. And now she puts me through it every other night. And if it’s not that, it’s the feeling of someone putting burning needles and pins into my eyes. Oh, and don’t forget the feeling of helplessness as I can only watch as my flesh rips and tears apart before my eyes.” She started sobbing. She couldn’t stop herself.

“But that’s still not the worse part; the worst part… is that I put my closest friends through all of this. The ones who were with me through everything. I did that to them. I didn’t want to… I honestly just wanted to help them. I wanted to make them stronger so they could protect themselves… But I just didn’t know how.”

Her grip on me loosened and I took that as an opportunity to get free, but it was a failed attempt. It only made her angrier. She clutched at my neck and slammed me as hard as she could against the wall behind me. Knocking the wind out of me completely. I couldn’t catch my breath, she was squeezing too tightly.

“Hey little Leena. Let’s play a game. I’ll roll my dice, and depending on what they land on, I’ll show you what it feels like to die.” A wicked smile spread across her face, I panicked, squirming and thrashing, kicking out hoping to get free. Black dots started appearing in the corners of my vision.

She leaned close to me and in a hushed voice she whispered, “Let’s see how lucky you are.”

But before she got the chance to let go of her dice, she was squarely punched in the face. I was dropped to the ground, gasping for air, trying to catch my breath. I looked over to see a flash of silver then a sickle appear out of nowhere, Karkat holding it to Vriska’s throat.

“Say your last fucking words you goddamned spiderbitch,” he hissed angrily. She kicked him off of her but he was back on his feet and had her against the wall, the sickle pinning her in place.

“Karkat stop!” I heard John yell and he shoved Karkat out of the way, running to Vriska. Who was now a sobbing mess. He held her close to him, murmuring softly and stroking her hair. She cried and shook in his arms. Despite what had just happened he ignored everyone and just focused on calming her down.

Before I could even assess the situation, Karkat was lifting me to my feet and practically shoving me out the door. He only stopped rushing when we were outside the complex; I sat on the stairs as he paced back and forth in front of me. Muttering and growling about things I couldn’t hear clearly.

“What the fuck just happened?” I said, breaking the silence.

“You almost died.”

“Well no fucking shit. I mean, what the fuck is up with Vriska and John. Is he okay? Shouldn’t we be up there making sure she didn’t eat him or some shit?”

“Well, Vriska sort of has these weird emotional breakdowns and shit and has incredible guilt built up from the game. So instead of dealing with it like normal people, she bottles the shit up like faygo until she explodes. Then goes back to acting like nothing while she gets tormented in her dreams. She’s just really fucked up.”

“The game? What? I’m so fucking lost. What does John even have to do with any of this?”

“They have a quadrant filled together.”

“Oh.”

“No not like that you fuckhead. It’s completely pale. He pacifies her when she’s like this, and I think he’s the only one who can.”

“oh…”

“You’re okay right? No concussion or any shit like that?” Karkat searched me over worriedly.

“Yeah I’m fine. I just have all this fucking blood on me…”

“We’ll just tell people its paint.”

“Sure whatever.”

 

It was concluded that night that I wouldn’t be living with uncle John anymore. Safety hazards for me and Vriska. She apologized for what happened, sort of. She apologized in the best way she could. Which wasn’t very well, but it worked for me. Karkat also threatened John that if she slips up he’s not going to hesitate to kill her. I don’t entirely blame him.

The only thing I was still lost on was the game. I always thought it was just that, just a game. But apparently there was a lot more to it then I knew about. And I think it's around time I figure what it was.


	10. Chapter 10

I was sitting in Karkat’s car waiting for him to leave the store, and I was starting to get restless. He was taking a long time and it was getting hot. Apparently he had to meet up with my uncle and talk about where I was going to live. Originally, custody was supposed to go to him in the first place, but after the funeral no one could get a hold of him. He just disappeared, up until recently when he so conveniently showed up. So now it was Karkat’s job to talk to him about my living conditions.

A few moments later I seen two tall figures walk out of the building. One, with an irritated look that never seemed to leave his grey face and the other man held a calm, straight look. I shifted uncomfortably feeling uneasy. The resemblances between him and my dad were uncanny, just the air around him was intimidating and oozing with the natural Strider essence.

As they got closer I nervously fumbled to get my door open and step out of the car. I straightened my shades and tried to play everything cool, which was significantly harder around Bro. He looked over at me as Karkat started to talk.

“Alright, because of legal bullshit and things like that, you’ll be staying with Dirk. Lucky for you, he has a place nearby so you don’t have to switch schools,” the words ‘house hoarder came to mind’ “most of your stuff is already packed but there things there too, knowing Strider he probably has too many god damned things at his house.” Karkat kept talking but I stopped listening.

Bro, or Dirk, was staring at me directly. Not hiding his gaze, he studied me, my face, and my reactions. I would do the same but I could only look for a few moments before the intimidation of the Kamina shades made me drop my eyes. I had a feeling he was testing me. And I was failing.

Before I knew it, Karkat was done talking and Dirk was walking away towards his car. An orange corvette z06. My palms started sweating. It looked like the inside might be a little small. I was praying that they didn’t expect me to ride with him. Not only would it be awkward as hell, it would be kind of scary.

But, despite how hard I was wishing, a small push from Karkat told me who I would be riding with. I turned around to at least say goodbye but he was already getting in his car. With clammy hands and nervous swallow, I started my way towards Bro’s car. I opened the door and took a seat, I was right; me and Bro were seated pretty close. It only made me more nervous.

My eyes darted around the car, from what my dad said, Bro practically had hordes of puppets around him wherever he went. I leaned forward unconsciously to look around more but I jumped when I heard bro speak.

“I don’t take him with me everywhere you know.”

I sat back, embarrassed. He was talking about lil’ Cal. I guess I was looking for him; he was like a childhood friend after all. Always there. Now that I look back on it, it was a little weird, because he was _always_ there. I suppose it’s kind of a surprise that he actually isn’t here now.

The car ride to his house was awkward and tense. When we got there things only got more awkward. I mean, he might have been my uncle, probably the only person other then my mom and dad who’s actually related to me, but I never really developed a comfortable relationship with him. I’ve seen him around, he always shown up at big events, and I’ve spent a day or two with him and my dad. But through all that, we never established a relationship. Now that it’s forced, I don’t think it’s going to form incredibly smoothly.

After walking numerous flights of stairs, we finally arrived to the apartment. It was sort of small, two bedrooms, and a complete mess. There were piles of things everywhere. Robot pieces, smuppets, hats, swords, all kinds of weird and potentially useful shit.

“Your rooms over there,” Bro said walking past me down the hall. I followed a few feet behind until he walked into a bedroom and shut the door behind him. I guess he was calling it a night. I wasn’t ready to just yet.

I walked out to the living room, taking a peak around. I did what I could not to trip on anything, it was harder than I thought. Stopping at one of the plush piles and picking up a smuppet. It was sticky, wet, and squelched when I picked it up. Screaming I flung it across the room, then rubbed my hands off on my pants.

“Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew. What even was that?” I squealed, disgusted. Then stooping over on the same plush pile to investigate. I found a spilled bottle of orange soda. I sighed in relief. I don’t know what I thought it was but I was thankful it was just soda. I stood  up and turned around, only to scream and fall flat on my ass into the smuppet pile.

Little Cal was there; smiling and grinning as always. I guess I hadn’t seen him right next me earlier. I gave him a little fist bump. He _was_ the shit, after all. I picked him up and wandered the apartment for a few more minutes before deciding to turn in. I set lil’Cal on the couch and walked into my new room.

It had computer, turntables, and was chalk full of badass shit. I flopped on the bed and just took it all in. It even had photo lines across the ceiling. I remember catching my dad a few times doing photography or developing his own film. Maybe I could give it a whack myself.

Though anything I intended on doing would be done tomorrow. For now, I curled up on the bed, pulling the quadrant blanket up to my chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know its short I'm sorry don't hate me.


End file.
